Tuesday, July 24, 2012
"No cover charge. Your clothes get in free."
Honda is sponsoring the next tour of The Moody Blues. It will be called "In Search of the Lost Accord." Much better than Clearasil's proposed tour: "Days of Future Pussed." ARGH, that would be awful. Fortunately the acne skin company has decided to sponsor a Roaring Twenties Broadway musical instead. "Puttin' on the Zits."
This zombie craze has hit the works of D.H. Lawrence. "Lady Chatterley's Liver." (Served with a nice Chianti?)
The Fullerton Functional Furniture Warehouse introduced in 1961 the first coffee table ACTUALLY made out of compressed coffee beans. "Anyone for coffee?" the hostess asked, before axing off a leg from the early American table piece, grinding it into the coffee maker. "A Fine Coffee Table...An Even Finer Cup of Coffee" was their sales motto. They stopped sales in 1963.
Nudist magazines in Braille are sought after collectibles.
Amzac is Prozac that hasn't made the big league.
"It's bigger in the inside." Doctor Who trying to impress a girl he's just chatted up at the Paul Raymond Revue Bar.
How about Lucifer, the Morning Star, as a spokesperson for Life Alert? "Help me! I've Fallen."
In New Guinea, the most popular show on cable is Mud Men.
New disco in Moscow: Doctor Zhiva A Go Go.
India remaking Bollywood version of Orson Welles classic. Watch for The Third Mantra, the Adventures of Hari Lime.
Say the following ad tagline in a French accent: " I can't believe it's not butt hair."
If Yusuf Islam had become a Buddhist and married Chinese, he might now be known as Cat Chow.
Pete Townsend sells out the Who to Exxon-Mobil: "Won't Get Fueled Again."
An original photo of Lee Harvey Oswald on sale on Ebay. It's framed.
New disco in England based on Alfred Hitchcock: Vert A Go Go.
Mexican eye candy: Pez Vega.