Friday, September 30, 2011

"There are no friends left."

An old comrade from the White Russian daze, Steamer Ed (of the Industrial Revolution, not the Bolshevik), sometimes asks on message boards, regarding yours truly, "Is he still alive?"  Or if this very own beacon of cathode fails to prove any vital signs, he will email the same question.  Below is the form letter sent in reply:











Dear Mr. Steam R.

Thank you for your letter regarding Mr. Gui Godden.

Unfortunately, Mr. Gulden passed away in 2002 and our company has retained sole licensing and image rights to Mr. Gudin's creative output for these past eleven years.  If you wish to incorporate any of our highly visible, yet late lamented client's unique creations, say on cocktail napkins or Scandinavian Pleasure Enhancers, please feel free to inquire on our rate system.  We all sorely miss Mr. Gunden's contributions to the world of art, but know that his spirit will live on in our vast array of tasteful yet highly profitable commercial options.

Best regards,

Mort Scavanger

CEO Pacific Relations Industrial Celebrity Keepsakes (prick, for short...for certainly it is)


Now this could be a Howard Hughes sort of thing.  You know, where the head of it all has long shuffled off this mortal coil but the shadow corporation pretends he's still alive.  He's an eccentric, you understand.  Stays up all night.  Heavily medicated.  Wears Kleenex boxes for slippers.

More sober minds prevail.  Taking care of business and all that.

Who can say for sure.  But like that film with Paul Le Mat and Jason Robards, here are some claimed recent sightings:





F for Fake?  G for Guise?

(End title credits...song, Burt Bacharach, "Disguise in love with you.")

Snack bar theme.  House lights up.  Intermission.